Plans are...afoot.

Stay tuned....

Livingdead


I'm so alive my skin so cold and fake I close my eyes
I know that now's the time to take my chance with death and realize

Nails Rocked. Better than the STL show. Once I seen how tame GA was, I was wishing I had tix down there. but alas, I was resigned to the nosebleeds of section C, where the people "who came to see the band who did that closer to god song" where.

Seemed like the new songs were more refined this time than they were for the STL show, and I Loved the Fragile-era stuff they played, particularly Even Deeper and The Big Comedown, and glad they didn't play Starfuckers. No Love Is Not Enough, though, damnit, and no The Day the World Went away, but minor faults for an otherwise kickass show.

I'd love to get my hands on a boot of this show.


And now, time for work.

Livingdead







We gotta make them hear us in East Rekjavik

Sorry. been busy all week with work. I'm splitting time between two stores now, and I can't really say I enjoy it, But it gives me some more of the all-important money. I haven't had much to write about of late anyway. there's only so many ways you can write "Life sucks and I hate the world" before you start resorting to bad Poetry. and since i'm not a memeber of the cure or a teenaged goth/emo kid, i'll spare you.

Going to the NIN concert in champaign tonight, first concert of thier second leg of the tour, so hopefully it'll have a different setlist than what me, brandocrap, and slowbek saw in STL back in October.


Been playing a lot of Diablo 2 again, which is another reason why there haven't been many updates of late(especially on the weekend). It's a time-killer, and since the bars are in decline as of late, I'm down with that.

Working this Valentine's day. Yippee. I get to see a bunch of couple come in and rent movies that they aren't going to watch anyway. Fuck them. and fuck Valentine's Day. I hope the world ends that day.

ever the bitter peach,

Livingdead



i just made you up to hurt myself

Sometimes, I think of my semen as an Oort cloud.

Yeah, you think that’s disgusting, but try masturbating when you have that in your head coupled with a Primus Song. Really kills the mood.

I just had to share that with you.

And yes I know I’m a weirdo.


Livingdead


Here I come Constantinople
Here I come Constantinople
I am coming Constantinople
Here I come

So, I'm bored, I'm on the internet, and I couldn't will myself to go play a game(which is terrible, mind you).

what do I end up doing?

Watching TV. on the internets.

Now, you might be thinking "wow, that's pretty goddamn cool".
well, yes and no.

Going here will show you a metric assload of channels that broadcat on the internet. here's the problem: a good portion of it is Christian TV, and I like watching sermons and prayer sessions about as much as I like going to church(i.e. I don't).

the rest of it is community access, which given it's nature, isn't on at 4 in the morning. then you have the "business" channels, which are... you know what? let's just put it this way. it's not CATV. At least Cable has sometimes interesting infomercials.

So, enough of america's Suckass internet TV. Hey, i'm quasi-cultural, i'm willing to take a taste of the World. So I took a look at International Internet TV.

After an abortive attempt to find a Canadian Station that might have Women's Soccer or Hockey, i hopped over to Japan, to which I was treated to a lengthy interview of some J-pop musician who appearantly just had a new CD come out. Well, it's No tentacle-rape hentai, but i bet it was interesting, but that whole "I don't speak japanese" thing kinda interfered with me being able to understand what the hell they were saying.

So, i skip to a part of the world who is in the current events. Iran. there's a Network based out of LA, so maybe it's in english. Oil, Planes, Dead people, and other stuff, All in Persian. nope. this dosen't interest me either. thought the News Bits were Interspliced with some crazy Heavy techno, but that's about it. My American Attention span will not stand for this. I must find something NOW.

And then I did. stumbling upon The Netherland netTV Station festival TV was a god send. images of Hot chicks in bikinis on the beach, speaking Dutch(I assume), with music in english. Awesome.

I mean, how can you go wrong when you hear lyrics "let me entertain you" and "i wanna have sex on the Beach"? Well, Okay, There was a Male assshot, and more guys about that i would have cared for and then the beach boys played, and my Bikini Boobies were gone, replaced with concert footage of a group called Faithless. I wasn't too happy about my foreign bikini-clad boobies being replaced by a seal-looking guy hopping around on stage Singing Europop, but you know what? considering what else i had already watched tonight, I was content. hell, the song wasn't even half-bad. I'd listen to it again, maybe. But i'd much rather watch foreign Bikini Boobies. Mettchen, If you see this, could you give me an idea of what the hell I watched?

now I'm going to go to bed before i find out that all the channels I watched tonight were all cleverly-disguised Gospel Channels.



Livingdead



Just below my skin I'm screaming

Stuff to talk about, but I didn’t type it up becuase I got into a long IM conversation with a Lovely lady from upstate. I worked a split-shift monday and really need to go to bed. promise I’ll make an update about events after work.

Eraser, however, has been a busy little shit. no one emails him, so he has taken to replying to the spammers(you’d get a bit stircrazy too if you learned to use the internet and sleep for 20 hours a day)


From: service@paypal.com
To: eraserthecat@gmail.com
Date: Jan 22, 2006 11:26 AM
Subject: Unauthorized Access Report (KMM9755003V34721L0KM)

Dear PayPal customer,

We recently noticed one or more attempts to log in to your PayPal account
from a foreign IP address.

If you recently accessed your account while traveling, the unusual log in
attempts may have been initiated by you. However, if you did not initiate
the log ins, please visit PayPal as soon as possible to verify your
identity:


Verify your identity is a security measure that will ensure that you are
the only person with access to the account.

Thanks for your patience as we work together to protect your account.

Sincerely,
PayPal


((the context is kinda lost, but it’s essentially a phishing scam))


a web-reply(since Paypal dosen’t like to publish it’s address)

Hi.

I got this email a couple of days ago. While I am sure you run an excellent service, we have a problem. I’m not a member, and unless you begin accepting plastic bottle caps as currency, I doubt I ever will. why?

Because I am a Cat.

Seriously, let me know if you guys start taking bottle caps. I have a stash of them under my master’s(I use that term loosely, as us _Felis cattus_ are our OWN masters) basement Stairs and icebox. I’d love to unload them for some catnip. That shit’s great. Probably not so much for you humans, but I gotta tell ya, you haven’t flown unless you’ve done three rails of nip and pissed in your master’s shoes becuase you thought it was kinda funny. I should use that stuff more often, since I run my ass off when i’m high, and I’m getting kinda fat since I learned how to Surf the internet.

anyway, I hope we can resolve this in a professional manner. Meow.

Sincerely,
Erasmus F. Thecat, Esq.
Internet Lawyer and potential Mensa member



and another:

From:Credit Union Security Service (Ohhh, clever. sure you didn’t mean ncua.gov?)
Reply-To: support@cuna.org
To: eraserthecat@gmail.com
Date: Jan 25, 2006 12:25 PM
Subject: Update Your Account Information

In attention of all Credit Union customers,


screening the accounts in our system. We recently reviewed your account,
and we need more information to help us provide you with secure service.
Until we can collect this information, your access to sensitive account
features will be limited. We would like to restore your access as soon
as possible, and we apologize for the inconvenience.


Why is my account access limited?

Your account access has been limited for the following reason(s):
* We would like to ensure that your account was not accessed by an
unauthorized third party. Because protecting the security of your
account is our primary concern, we have limited access to sensitive
Credit Union account features. We understand that this may be an
inconvenience but please understand that this temporary limitation is
for your protection.

(Your case ID for this reason is PCU1-818-214-242146.)


At Credit Union, one of our most important responsibilities to you, our
customer, is the safekeeping of the nonpublic personal ("confidential")
information you have entrusted to us and using this information in a
responsible manner. Appropriate use of the confidential information you
provide us is also at the heart of our ability to provide you with
exceptional personal service whenever you contact us.


How can I restore my account access?


Please confirm your identity here: Restore My Online Banking and complete the "Steps to Remove Limitations."
(Link removed)
Completing all of the checklist items will automatically restore your
account access.


To: Credit Union

From: Erasmus Thecat
Greetings.


Here’s Some information for you to update with.

I’m a fucking cat.

Can i have access to my account now? I need to buy some prosthetic Balls to impress the local Alley Queans becuase my dumbfuck owner had me Neutered. and Claws. Genius seems to think that Excercising the ’ole claws on some furniture is tantamount to stealing in the Muslim world.

As you can See, I’m in a real Bind. please free up my account Soon. I tried submiting my pertinent information but your webserver seems to be down. I hope you Resolve this soon. and throw in some Nine Lives Food for the inconvenience you’ve caused me.


Sincerely,
Erasmus F. Thecat, Esq.
Internet Lawyer and Backup Keyboardist for Dream Theater




Livingdead

Man I sure do love them red haired girls
Im just like all the boys from Texas

And now for a Real update.


Yesterday, I was at work. A teacher from my alma mater comes in, looking for a movie for her kids. "One with either Reptiles or Amphibians. you got any of those?"

"Unless we have Any Nat Geo Movies, I don’t think so." I look to the manager, as she shakes her head no.

"How about this one? This Has a Huge Amphibian in it! and it’s Rated PG-13, so it can’t be too nasty for the kids, right?"

This is the movie she picked up for her class.

Does anyone see the problem here? Here, I’ll spell it out for you:



IT’S A FUCKING SHARK.


Now, I don’t really expect anyone, let alone a High school "Special Needs" Teacher, to know the difference between Osteichthyes and Chrondrichthyes, but as a teacher, I would hope that you’d know that Sharks are a Godamned Fish and not an Amphibian. Let me Reiterate that for you.

SHARKS ARE NOT FUCKING AMPHIBIANS!

I won’t even go into the whole "Shitty sci-fi movie as a legitimate teaching aid" angle that should be rather appearant. might as well teach them to be Ditchdiggers.

From now on, I’m just going to say that I graduated from a School in Southern Illinois and not specify which one.


In other news, there’s stuff going on, which I will talk about later tonight. I’m gonna go get some Radiata Stories time in. I got a backlog from the last couple of weeks, most of which is probably forgotten, but i’ll try my best to recreate the magic.

Livingdead


Let me see you
Stripped down to the bone
Let me hear you crying
Just for me

The post, written like over a week ago, where I was bitching about the loss of my title page:

Yeah, I know. I’m kinda sitting here going "WTF happened to my Page?" My Title is gone, having run off with my calender, and the formatting... Well, it makes me think I should put a picture of a Unicorn up. Thanks Bloghorn, You ruined my life! I’m going to start posting shitty poetry that I wrote as a teenager in a Place where i’m accepted - Like Livejournal. Or, better yet, I’ll put TEN THOUSAND STREAMING VIDEOS on my myspace page, be all Cool Hand Luke.

Gene Rayburn is from C-Town. I am offically creeped out and now have an irrational fear he will posess my body in oder to stage a game show comeback. Or, I will embark on an adventure that will involve the fate of the universe, S’mores, and a terror-inspiring fight against Gene rayburn, ressurrected as a cybernetic Zombie. Kill it dude... Kill it.

Seriously, WTF happened to my Page?

Livingdead
Darth Skanka of Boghorn


Amended post:

I’m an elitist jackass who is stuck in my ways and I’m sorry. thank you, Bloghorn, and I’m a moron because I don’t know your layout and quite honestly refused to learn it.

Now that I’ve been somewhat humbled by the powers that be, I’ll try to learn a thing or two so maybe my blog dosen’t suck so much and won’t Whine like a bitch next time something goes wrong.


Livingdead


Thank you for making me feel like I am guilty
Making it easy to murder your sweet memory

I’ve been up too damn long Penis Gourd work slow actually did stuff was supposed to Ill show you my hammer of justice want to play games but must sleep Goddamn you Gene Rayburn Never stand in the way of a fat man and a bowl of chicken and dumplins lives will be lost The Constant Gardner kicks ass Burn in hell Westboro Baptist Church You said you’d bake us a cake! okay goodbye


Livingdead


Lost inside the boundary

So I was going to bitch about how I’ve screwed up my sleep schedule and how I am just going to be a bushel of peaches today when I get off work at 5, but when I came back to my computer, I had an authorization note flashing me on my Q:

- Hi. Just wondering, why a guy like you does not like most beautiful women around the world - Russian ones? - Answer. Visit *someshitty website* to make sure :-) Have a nice day.


cXkodPp


Awesome. Just awesome. spam in my ICQ. Nevermind the fact i'm in invisible 99% of the time anyway.

I, being the natural jackass that I am, cannot let this go unanswered. I mean, this woman has cut through to the bone on me. she sees the real me, the shy introvert that is just yearning for affection from the opposite sex.



"well, the answer is kinda complicated, but it rest on three reasons:
I’m ugly as fuck, I’m poor as fuck, and I’m weird as fuck.

I’m pretty sure the "poor as fuck" is the only thing that interests you, since if i’m poor, then obivously I can’t buy myself a russian lady.


I guess I’ll just have to find my wife The old-fashioned way: roofie-coladas, knocking them up unsuspectingly, or church.

No, YOU have a nice day. "


What a perfect way to start off the day. no, really. this just invigorates me on a day where i’m going to be dealing with the public.


Why oh WHY can’t I ever get a random Message from, say, Leslie Rankine? Cherielynn Westrich? or Petra Haden?


Living "I just wanted to say ’Fuck’ one more time" Dead



I’d open my heart just to see what’s inside
A mountain of raw that’s too big to hide

Right. Been a while since I’ve updated. Sorry bout that.

Anywho, not a whole lot to say, really. Got some things cooking on the burner that just might get me off of bloghorn and on my own website, just gotta get a couple queries cleared, and we’ll see how that pans out.

New years was good, And i’ve been sucked into the vortex of Diablo 2 yet again. that, and I got ahold of Resident Evil 4 again. I’d play it, but I’m a scared little bitch and won’t play the game late at night because it creeps the fuck out of me.

I got an email in my spam account(thanks, Yahoo!) not too long ago. normally, I dump ths shit like everyone else does, except for one particular type of spam - the advance fee fraud. I’ve talked about this stuff back on the old blog before. Here’s the email(in all caps and shittily formatted, for the sake of the hearing impaired, i’m sure):


DEAR DAME,

I AM VERY SORRY FOR THE EMBARRASEMENT THIS MAIL MIGHT CAUSE YOU,AS WE
HAVE NOT MET BEFORE. I AM BARRISTER FRANK IDEH,A SOLICITOR AT LAW. I AM THE
PERSONAL ATTORNEY TO LATE ENGINEER PAUL DAME,WHO USED TO WORK WITH
SHELL OIL COMPANY HERE IN NIGERIA.

HEREIN AFTER SHALL BE REFFERED TO AS MY CLIENT.ON THE THE 21ST OF
AUGUST 2002,MY CLIENT, HIS WIFE AND THEIR CHILDREN WERE INVOLVED IN A CAR
ACCIDENT ON THEIR WAY RETURNING FROM THE BEACH.ALL OCCUPANT OF THE VEHICLE
UNFORTUNIATELY LOST THEIR LIVES.SINCE THEN,I HAVE MADE SEVERAL
ENQUIRIES TO LOCATE ANY OF MY CLIENT’S EXTENDED RELATIVES BUT THIS HAS PROVEN
UNSUCCESSFUL.I CAME ACROSS YOUR NAME AND CONTACT WHEN I WAS SEARCHING
FOR MR. DAME’S RELATION,BUT MY SEARCH WAS UNSUCCESSFUL.SO,I CONTACTED YOU
FOR THIS PROJECT. I AM CONTACTING YOU TO ASSIST IN REPATRIATING THE MONEY
AND PROPERTIES LEFT BEHIND BY MY CLIENT BEFORE THEY GET CONFISCATED OR
DECLARED UNSERVICEABLE BY THE FINANCE COMPANY,WHERE THESE FUNDS WERE DEPOSITED.

PARTICULARLY,THE BANK WERE THE DECEASED HAS AN ACCOUNT VALUED USD$9.8
MILLION DOLLARS,LAST YEAR ISSUED ME 12 MONTHS NOTICE TO PROVIDE THE
NEXT OF KIN OR HAVE THE MONEY CONFISCATED,AND THIS ALTIMATUM EXPIRES BY THE
NEXT MONTH.

SINCE I HAVE BEEN UNSUCCESSFUL IN LOCATING THE RELATIVES FOR OVER TWO
YEARS NOW, I SEEK YOUR CONSENT TO PRESENT YOU AS THE NEXT OF KIN OF THE
DECEASED SINCE YOU HAVE THE SAME NAME,SO THAT THE PROCEED OF THIS DEPOSITE
VALUED AT USD$9.8 MILLION DOLLARS CAN BE RELEASED TO YOU AND THEN YOU AND I CAN
SHARE THE MONEY.50% FOR ME 45% FOR YOU AND THE REMAINING 5% WILL BE FOR THE
EXPENSES AND TAX.

HE MADE THE MONEY IN ONE OF THE OIL DEALS HE HAD WITH OUR OIL
MINISTER.ALL I REQUIRE IS YOUR HONEST CO-OPERATION TO ENABLE US SEE THIS BUSINESS
THROUGH.

I GUARANTEE THAT THIS WILL BE EXECUTED UNDER A LEGITIMATE ARRANGEMENT
THAT WILL PROTECT YOU FROM ANY BREACH OF THE LAW.IT IS 100% RISK FREE.

PLEASE FORWARD TO ME THESE INFORMATION:

1.YOUR FULL NAMES AND CONTACT ADDRESS.
2.AGE AND OCCUPATION
3.TELEPHONE AND FAX NUMBER FOR EASY COMMUNICATION

AS SOON AS I RECIEVE THESE INFORMATIONS, I WILL INFORM YOU THE NEXT
STEP.

THANK YOU FOR YOUR TIME.


YOUR FAITHFULLY.
BARRISTER FRANK IDEH


Now, normally, I get a chuckle and save them for later reading when I actually do go through my yahoo account, which is about once a month.

but Boredom can be a very naughty mistress, and We Had a hell of a time tonight.


Date: Mon, 9 Jan 2006 02:59:46 -0600
From: "Erasmus Thecat"
To: frankideh_9@msn.com
Subject: NOTICE OF RECIEPT

Mr. IDEH,

My name is Erasmus Thecat, Attorney and Legal Guardian of a Mr. Dame,
whom you contacted recently concerning the death of his relative,
Paul.

My client was in an accident himself himself back in 2004. Remarkably
he survived, but not without sustaining major brain injury after
laying catatonic for six months. the injuries sustained left him
invalid, and I took him as my legal ward as a posthumous favor to his
parents. It is fortunate that his parents, who died when he turned
19, left him with a fortune that he did not spend gratitutiously, and
as such, has been placed within good care. Mr. Dame’s funds, while
certainly considerable, are sure not to last forever. So it is
fortunate that you did contact my client.

However, my ward would be outraged if he were to know that you intend
to take 50 percent of what is his LEGAL inheritance. In fact, I am
appalled for him that you would seek to "share" what is rightfully his.
I will not pretend to know Nigerian inheiritance laws, but I can
assure you that I will be seeking injunctions on behalf of my charge
of this financial company that seeks to confiscate this inheiritance,
as well if you intend to take more than 20 percent, less fees and
taxes comeing out of your percentage.

Being an attorney yourself, you can see that I am acting in the best
interest of my Retarded charge, and I will continue to do so. As
such, any further correspondance with my client should be done through
me at this email address, and once more favorable terms have been
worked out, We can begin the process.

Your Expedient Reply is requested regarding this legal matter.


Sincerely,



Erasmus F. Thecat, Esq.
Legal Guardian



And there ya go. an update for the masses. And yes, The addess and email is real.


Livingdead



Make it like a godsend
Feeling like a has-been

Last update of the year.


Nobody really came to this to see the good things, so lets get them out of the way first.

Love Blooms - lots of friends becoming committed to thier respective halves this year, engagements, marriage, and anniversaries prosper. Above all the gloom, I’m glad for every one of them.

Friendships Revived - Seeing Cliff, Dawn, and Noelle Back in June after missing them last year. The ressurection of the Joplin Gathering, and seeing a large contingent of friends that I haven’t seen in a long time, and meeting new ones as well that I hope to see again next year.

Wander Lust - While in Ohio, going to Evans City, Pennsylvania, Where it all started. Then in October, the West Coast Super Death Trip with Brandocrap, which was more or less a condensed version of "The Tour of the Dead". Eleven states got their faces rocked in nine days, With California Getting the brunt of the attack.

Zigga, Please - A lot of Zombie Movies(some good, some horrible) released this year, Not to mention the return of the great one, George A Romero.

Noise God - With Teeth Released, then the NIN Concert @ St. Louis In October.

Au Graits - Compy gets Upgraded, thanks to castoffs from Cracka Jack and Brandocrap, and a Backlog of Computer games to play, NOtable ones being Warcraft 3, Half-Life 2, Civilization 3, Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic, and the ever-succulent Neverwinter Nights.


But What should be the greatest day of days, isn’t. Last year, I was sad because I wasn’t with the one I loved. This year, I am bitter. I had my chance earlier this year. Somehow, I blew it yet again. From what I understand, I was too pushy about getting back to where we were. Then, I was Betrayed. I listened to advice that wasn’t In my best interests. I poured myself out to the very person who now has a detailed roadmap of my mistakes.

It seems I am fit only to stand in your shadow. In love, in life, and in work. Do you see why I am bitter yet? Do you understand? I’m supposed to be okay with this, even congratulate you for doing what I appearantly could not. Grin, bear it, and wish you two well. You seem to be doing fine without them. Perfect, even.

I guess it was all a pipe dream anyway. I have grown too old, jaded, and ugly to make it work. So these are the words of the wrong, and the wronged. A testimony of the walking wounded. the ones who love, Who lose, who lament.

Nothing else to say, I guess. Nothing that matters.



Always.





And Never.


broken bruised forgotten sore
too fucked up to care anymore
poisoned to my rotten core
too fucked up to care anymore

Been playing a lot of Neverwinter Nights Diamond of late(a hearty thank you goes to The Jones Boys for that one), that and work has been the reason for the lack of quality updates(and I use the word quality loosely here). so, apologies to my readers, all three of you.


Tomorrow is the big bash and the Slowbek’s. It is also the day of what is usually my most personal update of the year, of which is also part of the reason of the lack of updates, as I’ve been working on it this week.

But for today, we’ll be blind to that for now, and do a much more uplifting update, if not a bit bland.

I didn’t read many books that came out in 05, so we’re going to skip over that one.

Top 5 Watch of 05


1. Land of the Dead; Simon Baker, John Leguizamo, Dennis Hopper.

2. Sin City; Bruce Willis, Mickey Rourke, Jessica Alba.

3. Hotel Rwanda; Don Cheadle, Nick Nolte, Joaquin Phoenix.

4. Constantine;Keanu Reeves, Rachel Weisz, Gavin Rossdale.

5. Million Dollar Baby; Clint Eastwood, Hilary Swank, Morgan Freeman.


Top 5 Listen of 05


1. With Teeth; Nine Inch Nails

2. Demon Days; Gorillaz

3. In Your Honor; Foo Fighters.

4. Community Service II; The Crystal Method

5. Little by Little; Harvey Danger


Top 5 Play of 05:

1. Resident Evil 4; Capcom.

2. We Heart Katamari; Namco.

3. God Of War; SCEA

4, NHL 2K6; Sega.

5. Star Wars: Battlefront II; LucasArts.


Till the Morrow, kid.

Livingdead


Keep you locked in

So easy to slag when you’re the one who benefits from my mistakes, hmm?


Oh, look. I can make thinly veiled references, too.


Livingdead


You know I can see
What you really are

Dear whatever imaginary person this is supposed to go to:

This is kind of a last minute thing(much like anything I do), and I seriously doubt that you will come through with this(I’m still waiting on that Tonka Dump Truck And Crane when I was five), but I thought I would give this a try nonetheless.

Now, if you ask me and several relations, I haven’t exactly been a stellar person this year. What with the drunken rampages, getting kicked out of school, completely fucked things up with the ex, all the hatred I keep pent-up, and the general disdain i have for my fellow man, but I think if you’ll sit down and listen to my side of the story over a plate of cookies and vodka-spiked milk, you’ll see that I’m not the complete villian that said people would paint me. It would take too long to refute all these charges at the moment, but i thought I would go ahead and let you in on what I feel I deserve for whatever the fuck this holiday is supposed to be. It’s a short list, as i’m not a greedy person:


1. I want to Strangle every last human being in the world to the point of death.



Merry Whatever,


Livingdead



P.S. If you don't come through, I hope you choke on Frosty's Icicle, You fat fuck.



I wasn't born with enough middle fingers

I meant to get this up earlier then now, but hey, things happen.

Friday at work. this guy comes in, looks around, asks if he has any late charges. No, no you don’t, because you haven’t rented in a month, and you didn’t have any when you checked monday, either.

Anyway, looks around, then leaves.

Comes back ten minutes later,. asks me and My co-worker a question.

"Did you guys happen to notice anything strange when i was in here?"

We look to each other, and shake our heads. I’m thinking ’Wonderful. Some do-gooder dumbshit who wanted to see if we’d notice him stealing something.’

"Uhm, no."

"Well, My belt buckle was undone and I just noticed it myself, and I was just wondering if you guys noticed, or if anyone complained about my belt being undone."


Right, because when a GUY comes into the store, the first place I’m going to look is at his crotch. Moron.

Of course, he then motions towards said nether parts, showing the now offending belt properly buckled. Customers are staring in our direction in desbelief.

"No. No one complained."

"Okay then. Have a nice night." then walks out.

Upon his exit, co-worker starts laughing, Customers are laughing, some elaborating on how he’s a fruitcake, and I’m Creeped the fuck out, having just heard earlier this week that he’s *ahem* a bit of a Peeper with the boys.

Seriously, if you realized that you had your fly open, would you go BACK INTO the place of business you were just at and then ask the employees if they happened to notice that the barn door was open? I think I wouldn’t show up again till at least the next shift change.

this ranks right up there with the time the old black woman stopped in and asked about our tanning lotion, thinking it was sex jelly, then telling me that we shoudl sell that stuff so she can buy some to "get her man excited". in fact, i’m pretty damned sure this surpasses that. at least that was funny. this was outright creepy.

I really want these goddamned holidays to hurry the fuck up and get over with. i value the time with the friends, but hate just about every other aspect of it nowadays, and for good reason.

Of course I had to end on a bitter note. Did you expect any less of me?



mdame


Makes you talk a little lower
About the things you could not show her

Despite the wealth of material I would be able to reap from it, I don't really write about my dreams too much. Partly because this isn't some sort of dream journal stuck next to my bed that’s faggoted up with unicorn and skull stickers. Partly because by the time I get around to banging out an update on here, I forget major chunks of the dream.

The last reason, which is most likely the biggest reason, is becuase I seem to not be able to have a simple "cigar in a cave" dream, where the symbols are easy to digest and interpret upon waking up. oh, lordy no.


No, instead of dreams that hold simple icons that can reflect hidden characteristics and bring greater understanding of one's self, or are the symbol of deep desires that I dearly want, I get:

Hyp-hopping through Wikipedia or IMDB

Playing Game X all night long(usually after a marathon session of playing game in question)

Dreams where I'm fighting Zombies(I used to have these almost nightly, now only about once a week. I kinda miss them)

The infamous "Civil War" dream (Another blog in itself)

A dream I had when I was a teenager that is too complex to put up here(again, one of those another blogs in itself) I wrote a story about it for H.S. English and ended up getting a D- minus Becuase it had absolutely nothing to do with the subject I was supposed to be covering

Working a hideously long shift, complete with an all-star cast of trouble customers, only to get off work, go home, set the alarm and hit the sack, only to be woke up in reality mere minutes after I fall asleep in the dream

"Serial" dreams, where I pick up where a dream left off the night before. these can take up to a week to finish, usually involving zombies or some post-apocalypse scenario(these are actually pretty cool, but never make any goddamned sense)

Teaming up with the ghoulies to fight crime

Last night's dream involved a girl who I would love to get to know better, and yet, becoming completely terrified to attempt to kiss her (despite the "go ahead" Signals she was blatantly sending) and ending up walking out of her house to play a broken pinball machine at Walt's pizza, after Having played the Hero and Saving a school of children from a crazy pedophile Who took the entire school hostage to indulge his fantasy of touching children with Sticks of Butter.


Anyone wanna try and psychology any of that? the online dream interpreters don't have listings for Zombies, Pinball machines, and Sticks of butter, not to mention Cockroaches with human asses and Rabbits with huge male genetalia.

Told ya I was out there.


mdame



go back to sleep

Linkage added. No, I dunno why I didn’t add it sooner, either.

Still speaking of games.... BWAHAHAHAHA.


Making breakfast soon, so I’ll keep this short.

Saw Sin city Uncut for sale last night at Wal-Mart( I have a love-hate relationship on many levels with that place) and took everything in me to keep from buying it. between that, Resident Evil 4, Tony Hawk’s American Wasteland, Dragon Quest VII, and a slew of other things, I made good getting out of there not buying any of them. Times like this make me miss having two jobs. Sure, I was burnt the fuck out, and i had almost no free time, but i made enough money that blowing 50-60 bucks on games or movies a week didn’t put me in a tight spot.

Then again, when I was working two jobs, I was also drinking half my paycheck away every weekend in addition to buying said games and movies, so I still ended up close to broke every weekend.

I’m half-ass confident now that I'm not trying to actively kill myself by way of Alcohol Poisoning, that I would at least do marginally better. hindsight, 20/20, and all that fucking bullshit that people use to assuage themselves about the past.

More musings later. Time to cook up some grits, hash, bacon, eggs, and toast for the G-ma and Moms.


mdame

How can I hold on
With nothing to hold on to

We're Going Down....

i wrote that on the 12th of last month, thinking it would only be a couple of days while i got my blog software upgraded.

it almost became a eulogy. it's been over a month since my Site at New Blood Studio went down. Hosting problems, and some nasty stuff about not getting PHP, ASP.NET and MySQL to play well with each other, and now our new host had to find a new hosting company... which is good, but the downside is that the new hosting company supported ASP only, making the blog software i have useless. Fuck.

So, here i am, Homeless on the net. Slumming around in the blogging world. Not that my Site was a piece of Digital art to hoot and holler about(i'm not exactly a PHP and HTML wizard), but it was Home. i had a good two years of history where i had creative freedom, The space to put up lots of pictures, and knew the inner workings of the site. I don't know Jack about bloghorn(or any of the other Journal/blogging sites), I don't know what my limits are on this place, and quite honestly, i enjoyed holding my head above the rest in the fact i wasn't associated with any of the other journal/blogging sites. I ran The site my way, i was an elitist about it, and i loved it.

and now, I'm here.



In the month since "The Art" went down, There was the roadtrip to California, Have had all kinds of things to seethe about(oh, how i Love to be a bitter little peach), Missed my two year anniversary date at New Blood, and had all kinds of cool things to talk about, but had nowhere to put them up to serve my attention-whoredom and thusly, forgotten about them. and right now, i'm just kinda "blah" about everything. I don't completely feel like writing this as we speak, but i'm tired of being displaced.

But, at least you guys can see WTF i’m up to. And WHEN i get my own Site, The Link will be posted here. And I Guaran-Goddamn-tee you I’m not staying here any longer than i need to get my ducks in a row.





anyway... here ya go. a horrible version of what used to be the one thing i could still hold my head up about.



Oh, how the mighty have fallen.



mdame



like you said
you and me
make it through
didn’t quite
fell apart
where the fuck were you?